personal notes

Going forward

date created: 2020-04-03

You might have noticed a slight change here, didn't you?

I just updated the blog to have a nice free and open source font that did quite an amazing job of resembling the sleek modern look of Helvetica that Apple likes to employ so much.

My layout clearly does not work to its strengths, but I feel like it is much easier on the eyes like this.

It's called Inter, by the way, check it out.

Now with that out of the way, I wanted to notify you of two things. The exciting one is my plans in regards to running this place, my direction going forward and the things I seek to build.

First things first, though, I want to address something personal.

Burnout

The crisis struck us all. Lots of us are sitting at home these days, hoping that this massive crisis will end soon enough to lead us into growth and prosperity again.

Not as much of me there, to be quite honest, as I've got very used to being at home for prolonged periods of time. That alone doesn't impact me much.

What does impact me, though, is the obsession.

Obsession with doing more. Obsession with overachieving. Obsession with "self-improving" in whatever sense of that word.

Obsession with working more. And more.

And more.

Not only that, but since it is very likely that I won't even see the uni building this semester, it all has transitioned into the internet and I am practically required to pretend that I study and actually pass my assignments in time.

This all has resulted in what I consider unhealthy behavior in regards to, well, working.

I spent last week doing nothing but work, really. And, well, browsing social media, but that rarely feels as gratifying as the proper piece of entertainment. It's more of a fidgeting mechanism, some baseless distraction that itself requires its own kind of attention. It very much blends in with all the work and creates this whole mucus of being work, all over again.

What I am getting at, is that I feel overworked. In the pursuit of trying to spend time as rationally as possible, I feel like I didn't spend time on myself whatsoever. That is possibly one of the most irrational things any human can get into, and feeling this can make one truly understand why this capitalist obsession with making people work for as much as possible is incredibly draining.

I am now looking for more ways to have a proper rest, so the progress on every thing I want (and am required) to do will be slower. Even though I don't think anyone really reads my blogs right now, I do feel an obligation to apologize because this is the thing I care about, and you might care about as well. My well-being is much more important than anything else out there. Apply that to yourself as well.

Now, for the more exciting part, I guess.

Changes

Boy, this is going to be some real shit.

I love videogames a lot, so videogames are going to be the very first thing I am going to write in my all-new blog section of the website (coming soon).

Expect my new blog to have:

From now on this "notes" section I created is going to be more personal, I think. This all is something to tame my creative beast till I am strong enough to pull off something very exciting.

I hope this endeavor of mine is going to pay off in the end. I didn't make this thing basically from scratch for no reason.

Closing notes

The pandemic is going strong, and it's kind of straining the family budget as well as my own (miniscule) budget. It isn't that crucial at this point in time, but if you are reading this and would like to tip me or something, here's my Patreon page. I can't have something like ko-fi out here because right now it is impossible to receive funds via Paypal in Ukraine, so this is set for upfront charge and thus you can treat it pretty much as the donation button. Just subscribe and unsubscribe, it works that way pretty well.

Now that I finished writing this, think I am going to watch some TV or whatever.